Crazy Socks & Writer's Block

I've always struggled with keeping friends who are girls. Part of it is because when I meet someone who's awesome and I look up to, I want them to like me. So sometimes without consciously thinking about it, I start changing myself when I'm around them in hopes that they'll like me. I also don't like confrontation so when I had a problem with someone, I would usually just let it boil and let resentment grow and grow, which is not a good way to do things. Then, there's the whole issue of just figuring out who you are, and people change and that's okay!  But then there's Joice. She was my roommate my first year of college, and will always be one of my best friends. There are so many things that she helped me get through over the years, and continues to help me through. She's an amazing woman and is going to do so many great things. I'm so grateful to have her in my life, always cheering me on. She's mentioned a million times on here, but I...

Halloween is Sammy's favorite holiday. It's also one of mine. I just love the skeletons and jack-o-lanterns, and all the colors of Halloween.  Sammy and I have had quite a few Halloweens together. Our first Halloween I was sick the day of, so he came over and watched a movie with me, which was so sweet. We did have costumes, we dressed up as Sam Flynn and Quorra from Tron for a Halloween party the week before Halloween. While it was fun, I don't like buying pre-made costumes because we spent a bit of money on those suits and literally only wore them for a few hours at a friends Halloween party. Plus, they weren't the most flattering and no pictures of that have survived.  Our second Halloween I was in the dorms and he was on 'trick or treat duty.' Literally, he wasn't allowed to leave home on Halloween because his dad wanted him to hand out candy.  He went as a rational consumer, and I was Elle Woods.  That was one of my favorite costumes because ...

As long as I can remember, I've struggled with anxiety. Even when I didn't know I was struggling with anxiety, I was struggling with anxiety. There was a whole summer before fifth grade where I had panic attacks every night and vomited all the time. Then I hit high school, and didn't know how to deal with all that anxiety and stress of being a teenager. It didn't help that I had a really crappy group of friends. There was a time of self harm, but with some therapy and developing some new friends, I moved past that.  When I was seventeen, my anxiety would get really bad whenever I was PMSing. Plus, I turned into a rage filled monster. So, I went to the doctor to try and get some help with my crazy PMSing. The doctor asked if I ever had thoughts of self harm, and when she heard that I had a past of it, she immediately prescribed me anti-depressants saying that I had depression. I had been fighting that label and getting put onto anti-depressants for over a year, but ...

One of my other favorite things about my job is that I get to dress cute. I'm not always on my feet, so I can wear sensible cute shoes, and the dress code is business casual. My parents were nice enough to buy me new shirts for graduation, and I got a few pairs of pants. Getting ready every morning has been a blast, and the other girls at work also dress up so we have fun complimenting each other's outfits. They've also given me advice on hair, which has really made my hair curl more! I feel so much more confident as well.  Here's a few of my favorite outfits. Please excuse my mirror shots. I don't have time to take nice pictures every morning.  The nice thing is that when I try something like tucking my shirt in, something I'm not entirely comfortable with, my coworkers let me know that I'm looking good. I love experimenting and piecing these together and feeling pretty:) 

I love the fathers in my life. My dad is such an amazing man and I really look up to him. The Family: A Proclamation to the World says that  "Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities. By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families." My dad (and mom, but this is Father's day:)) have done such a good job of making sure those principles were in our family growing up. I'll never be able to thank my dad for all that he's done for me. It's like my relationship with my Heavenly Father as well.  My dad is pretty darn cool. For my graduation, he wrote me a letter which he hasn't done since I was little. Not only that, but he sealed it with a wax seal. That letter really meant a ...

I actually have time to read again, and it's seriously the best. I've missed it so much, and am going to be trying new genres this summer while participating in my work's summer reading program. So, here's the first!  I started off with  The Wrath and the Dawn and The Rose and the Dagger by Renee Ahdieh. I loved these two books so much that I actually bought my own copies to have because these will definitely be books I re- read.    I made sure to get the hardcovers because the paperbacks don't have the red overlay, and I love the overlay.  I highly recommend these books. They're a retelling of Arabian Nights, or One Thousand and One Nights. Shahrzad volunteers to marry the king of Rey, Khalid. There's only one problem. For the last few months Khalid takes a new bride and kills her in the morning. One of those brides was Shahrzad's best friends. So, she volunteers to marry Khalid with plans to kill him. The only problem is staying alive past...

Sammy and I celebrated our two year wedding anniversary last week! I seriously can't believe that it's already been two years with him.   I know it's cliched, but two years ago I had no idea how much more I could fall in love with him. He's truly become my best friend, and we grow more and more together every day. It hasn't always been easy. Not even close. There's been a lot of adjusting, a lot of learning, and a lot of growing together. I remember being surprised our first month of marriage how much we fought in the grocery store, deciding what to buy. But, there's been so much growth and accomplishment.  In the past two years we've:  Gone on five trips together Bought two cars  Conquered my fear of flying  Made a home together  Gotten Sealed  A job promotion for Sammy Graduated college Gotten a real job Had our first pet (Gerald) Experienced the death of our first pet (Gerald) Discovered the magic of Sonic (and many man...

I'd originally been planning to write a post about all the odd encounters I've had at the library lately. Where I am is in the poorer side of town and on a street famous for it's prostitution, drugs, and so on. However, I've decided this isn't really appropriate. I'm not a doctor bound by privacy laws, but I don't feel right about sharing all of these things.  So, just know that every day is different. I've met people from all walks of life, who've said some pretty odd things to me. I've seen some pretty odd things that make no logical sense. I've had some people say that my shoes are sexy, and that I look delectable. Okay?  Despite all these weird encounters, I like my job. I like helping these people. I've definitely got a lot of great stories. 

Over Memorial Day weekend Sammy and I went up to Colorado and Manitou Springs. Sammy has never been there, and we really needed a getaway.  The first thing we did was go to Garden of the Gods. It's absolutely beautiful up there, and I knew Sammy would love it. We spent a few hours hiking around, and climbing up on rocks. Sammy was in heaven. He likes to pretend that he's a monkey. It was so nice being out in nature just the two of us, taking it in. This world is filled with so much beauty.  Being up there reminded us of being on our honeymoon, when we went exploring in Rocky Mountain National Park. So, after we were done hiking, we had lunch at Macaroni Grill, and then went to see X-Men Apocalypse. We saw Days of Future Past on our honeymoon, so it was only fitting. We absolutely loved the movie, deciding it was our favorite, the only thing that could have made it better was an appearance from Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellan. We also decided that we'll...

Thankfully I had work off and I was able to go to my friend Philippe's wedding with Sammy and Michael. Philippe's been such a great friend to me so I wanted to be there for his special day!  We had to take pictures in the backyard since we were looking so nice! The wedding was in the city park next to the lake and was absolutely beautiful. I don't have any pictures from the ceremony since there was a sign nicely asking us to not take pictures, and I'm a rule follower. There were so many cute aspects though, and the day was absolutely perfect. As the bridesmaids were walking down with their perfectly done hair and flowers, and all these cute things, I whispered to Sammy asking if we could re-do our wedding. Seeing other people's weddings after ours, there's so many things I wish we could have done differently, or I would like to add. He said no, because our wedding day was absolutely perfect.  I about swooned. I love that boy so much:) Philippe a...

It's official, I absolutely love my new job at the library! I've been there for three weeks now, and feel like I'm really getting the hang of things. Every morning I wake up and it's almost a surprise that I get to go back again. I've always wanted to work in a library. When I was in eighth grade I volunteered in one all summer and felt like that would be the perfect place to stay while I keep working on my novels. Whenever I told people that I was an English major, they'd ask if I was going to go into teaching. When I said no, they'd ask where I'd get a job then. I always said hopefully a library, knowing that that was a long shot. Yet, here I am!  This is my first big girl job, and it really shows. I keep getting excited about the littlest things that my older co-workers are used to. On my first day I was ecstatic to learn that I could have a water bottle with me. Yes, a water bottle. Then when I was told that I could go on a morning and afternoon...