Crazy Socks & Writer's Block

I decided it's time to look back at 2013. It was, an interesting year. It kind of flat up sucked at times and was one of the hardest years yet. But there were good times. So I'm looking at the good times. January- Sammy and my two year anniversary. Became a primary teacher. Misty joined our family. February- Learned about college laundry. Valentines Day. Started loving poetry. Joined Campus Computers March- Hung out with Kelsey. Got really into writing. Sammy and I had a stomach bug together. Then had an awesome date night. April- Tried on wedding dresses. Went to my first bridal shower. May- Discovered blog friends are pretty awesome. Moved out of the dorm. Went to Bolder Boulder. June- Got Apple certified. Found a time capsule. Started really making friends at work. July- I proposed to Sammy. Started finally getting help for my anxiety. Went swimming. August- Sammy got his new job. We got engaged!  September- I discovered the amazingness that...

Sammy's been sending me pictures every day from Mexico and I just thought I'd share them here! It really looks like a different world down there and his stories are so interesting! And he's taken to speaking in Spanish a lot more, it's pretty cute but I'm so rusty from high school I have to really think about what he's saying. His relatives all say I look like a tele novella star. It's pretty cute, I just hope they don't mean I look like a giant dramatic drama queen ;) I wish I was down there right now and hope one day my motion sick anxious self will make it there! Especially since it's like seventy there and snowing here. Blech. Gas station. They are owned by the government and have attendants I wonder where they get the volcano meat from His mom's house growing up Mandatory food shot Downtown Backyard  The kitchen is outside  Sugarcane fields where his uncles work Grandma Castro Grandpa Castro Rive...

Hello Blog Friends : ) As I've mentioned, I'm getting married. And I'd like to send you all an invitation because I truly count you as my friends : ) So, head over to this website. www.wiechdoctor.net/sammyandkylee  Thank you! Love you!

Well, I just got a text saying that Sammy's plane landed in Texas. He's going to Mexico for two weeks to see family for Christmas. It's been a rough past few days and I'm pretty nervous about the next two weeks. But, I'm going to try to stop worrying about him dying and just hope he's having lots of fun. I'm a little sad because I don't get to spend Christmas with him, and I didn't get to see him last Christmas either. But it's all going to be ok. I tried to fit in his suitcase. Didn't work. We did a lot the last few days to make up for him leaving! We saw the Hobbit. I was dreading seeing it because I hated the first one. It was sooooo slow and there were no woman in it. And it was three hours!!!! But the second one is a WHOLE lot better. So I didn't mind sitting for the whole time. Plus, we got to the theater really early and while we were waiting to go in, we saw another room was playing the Divergent trailer. So naturally I went...

I hung out with my old roommates and all our friends from our floor a few weeks ago. I was really excited about it because I hadn't seen some of these people since May. I wasn't going in expecting anything super exciting. I knew it'd been awhile and it'd be a little awkward at first. I wasn't expecting to get blown off and feel like I was back in high school again. And I didn't expect to feel so sad. When I first got over and was hanging with my girl friends it was fun. We were doing hair and makeup and such. I missed getting ready and all dressed up sometimes and sharing hair and makeup tips. But after that, things went downhill. Lets just say, that a very skunky smell was involved.  I left feeling really upset and the more I think about it,  it's just sad. Everyone's stories involved drugs and lots of alcohol. Lots of random sex. And as much fun as they claimed it all was, they all seemed sad. There was something really missing. I didn't really not...

Sammy and I went out for a date night yesterday and it was AWESOME! We hit up Dave and Buster's. We were thinking about Boondocks, but then we were like, whoa. Dave and Buster's is for grown ups. It was so much fun! I forgot how fun it is to go out and do something new. Definitely going to work on doing that more. We played some basketball, Sammy beat me twice and I beat him twice. It was quite satisfying. When he was winning he kept shouting Lebron, Lebron! So naturally I did that when I was winning. Sammy totally kicked my butt at the racing games though. There was this really fun one where the car actually moved. His car stayed still the whole time and mine was bumping all over the place. I freaked out when we were starting because I forgot which one was the gas pedal and you had to hit the gas to select options and such. We also did a motorcycle one and Sammy rocked that one as well. Then air hockey. I love me some air hockey. I won ;) We played a co player shooting g...

Once again, it's finals week. Time to study and stress about finals. Wrong. At least for me. I just realized something this last week, when it's finals time instead of stressing out about my finals, I find something else to stress about. Last year, I was convinced that I was going to move to Utah. I saw how much rent for apartments was out there and I was like, I'm in! I researched all the schools, how to transfer, jobs in the area, started filling out applications. I'd even found an apartment! And then, finals week went away and the planning slowed down a little bit. I eventually decided moving to Utah wasn't for me because I love my degree program at my school, and my scholarship program. So, I'm still here. I also compared phone plans between companies. That was fun. Not really it was depressing. Last Spring I started getting really into emergency preparedness. I researched food dehydrators, ways to grow food in an apartment, made a list of all the things t...

. At work, I added Britney Spears and Justin Beiber as influences on my coworkers pandora station. When he came into work, he didn't switch it to that station like he usually does. So, I had to sneakily persuade him to change it, saying I was in the mood for something different. Phew almost did a different station though, so I kept talking. Then, he finally clicked on his station and Hit Me Baby One More Time started blasting. We both laughed hard but he thought it was just some fluke, and skipped to the next song. When he was talking to customers I would keep skipping songs until another pop one came on. He never figured it out that if added them, and I couldn't stop laughing at my genius so I just told him what I'd done. He said that that was very well played. I had an essay due for economics. I was doing a book review of a book, crazy I know, and in the book the author briefly mentioned the economics of prostitutes. My professor always uses prostitutes as examples fo...

Well. November is over which means NaNoWriMo is as well. I didn't make my goal. After beating myself up for a bit, I took a step back. I wrote 24,488 words. Yeah, it's not even half of what I was aiming for. But it's 24,488 more words than I had at the beginning of the month. I'm proud of that. Schools almost over as well so hopefully I'll be able to get to that 50,000 before the end of this month. I'm still glad I did NaNoWriMo and I'll definitely do it again. I know I can still be an author. Right now I'm a want to be author, full time student, part time worker, and planning a wedding. Getting that much done is pretty impressive I think. I'm going to be an author one day and because of NaNoWriMo I'm one step closer. Lets do this December!

Was Thanksgiving! Which was awesome. I saw Catching Fire twice. I highly recommend it. The Divergent trailer plays before it as well which is AWESOME. We were running a little late the first time to the movies and I was worried we were going to miss the preview haha! I discovered Walmart is a great place to buy books. I scored while Black Friday shopping. I got five seasons of House, two of the Office, and some other movies. And pretty paper for my wedding flowers. Had lots of snuggle time. Had lots of nap time. Did no homework. Wrote about, 300 words. Took a break. Got to spend lots of time with my family. Started to figure out how to style this new hair. Discovered my dog is a very jealous creature. Watched the dog show. Taught a primary lesson with my garden gnome and pop tops.

I'm so thankful for my sweet Grandma. She's been such an amazing help these last few months. She's been reassuring. She always knows when to send me a sweet text or to see how I'm doing. She gives the best advice. She always reads my blog. She sends me sweet cards full of advice. She's always giving, giving, giving and never looks back. She is such an example of a godly woman and I hope to be somewhere near as awesome as she is one day. I love you Grandma so so so very much : ) And I love this picture of us because it's candid and yeah : )

Yesterday, I was just done. I didn't want to deal with this life thing anymore. Nothing serious was going on, I had just had really bad anxiety the day before and then all day that day and I was just tired and done. I pushed myself to get somethings done, and then decided I wanted to organize some drawers in my room. This is a very rare occurrence hahaha! As I started cleaning, I started getting more and more overwhelmed. I just wanted to throw things out, but I kept finding things I needed or wasn't sure what to do with. (What are you supposed to do with the monthly letters from your retirement fund?) I'm not digging the whole grown up papers thing. So, my already bad anxiety went up a level. But then I started finding things. First, it was my senior year yearbook. Even though it wasn't that long ago since I made it, I wanted to look through it. Then, I found a hand out on different relaxation techniques that had been handed to me a few months ago but I'd never r...

I finally did it. I've been saying I wanted to chop off my hair for awhile now, and today I did it. And honestly, I'm wondering why I didn't do it sooner. I LOVE my short hair! All of the damaged hair and knots are gone. I can put a hat on and not have a beard of hair. It's sooooo light! I was worried about what Sammy would think. He was very hesitant when I first said I wanted to do this, but when he saw me his eyes lit up and he was so excited. His mom was too! She said I look a lot older and like a new woman. I wanted a cute way to announce I cut my hair, so, I put this picture on Facebook with the caption, he wanted a lock of hair. So I gave him this. Haha I crack myself up.   It was fun getting my hair cut. It was long enough to be rubber banded, and hearing those scissors snipping was exciting. I wondered if I would cry like some women do, but I didn't. Then it was off for shampoo and even more snipping. I really connected with the woman who was cuttin...

This morning, I woke up to a pretty funny text message. Dear Kylee, I would like to show my appreciation towards you and your gift you bestowed upon me at the beginning of junior year. The enlightenment of knowledge through the hunger games was ever inspiring. I have recently ventured back from the premier of Catching Fire and it was AMAZING! Once again thank you for showing me the books and being educated before the movies were out. I am ever in your debt, and may the odds be err in your favor. Love, Cameron. District 13 This made me feel proud and laugh pretty hard. At the beginning of Junior year, we had to read a book every Wednesday and Cameron said something to the affect of, hey you read books, you should pick me one. So I scoured my bookshelves trying to pick the perfect one. I narrowed it down to The Giver, Ender's Game, and the Hunger Games. I was really hoping he'd pick one of the other two, but he picked the Hunger Games and then devoured it. It was awesome to ...

Ok, I'm feeling really thankful right now, and since this is my journal I don't want to forget all these sweet things that have happened.  Sammy really takes care of me. Today as I was freaking about the inch of snow, he kept saying over and over I'll take care of you, I've got this. And he did. We got everywhere safely today and were able to stay warm. He even showed me the seat on the bus where the foot heaters are.  When I was having a really bad day, where I couldn't even walk through the halls and was crying, he stayed calm and patient and then took me out to dinner at a place I'd mentioned I wanted to go. He'd just gotten a bonus at work and instead of spending it on something for himself, he took me out to dinner, even though I know it was hard to deal with me.  He pushes me to go to institute and be spiritual. I wouldn't have the testimony I had a year ago or the pieces I'm regaining today without his support and help.  He always takes care o...

I've really learned a lot about myself this semester from taking Public health. The first is that, I want to be an author. Second, I am a hypochondriac. Big time. Third, people who really like public health REALLY like public health, to the level it's overwhelming. So. How does a hypochondriac make her way through such a class alive? Here's a few tips. 1. You have a headache from not drinking enough, or staring at a screen too long, NOT because you have Ebola. 2. Make plans with your significant other in the case that one of you catches a deadly incurable transmittable disease. I have told Sammy that even if he has ebola, I'm going to snuggle him to the death. 3. Remind yourself that ebola hasn't been in the United States yet. 4. Don't tell everyone your funny ebola stories. Because then you'll just freak yourself out and start feeling sick. 5. Avoid all meat for about two weeks after the lesson on all the ways to get the stomach flu. 6. Get to...

This is my new friend. Her names Viviann but she goes by Brooke. She's almost three and is pretty awesome! When I went over to Sammy's yesterday she said my name as soon as I came in. Apparently everyone had been teaching her my name before I came over. She was shy for about three minutes and then gave me a high five. She showed me her toes and how she can count to ten in Spanish. And then she gave me a big hug. I'd brought a movie over so Sammy and I headed down to go watch it, but she said she wanted to come with. SAmmy's dad kept asking her to sit with him, but she wanted to hang out with me and Sammy. Is it bad this made me secretly happy? Haha! So we played with Brooke for awhile. I taught her about Yoda, played a roller coaster game with her, and then we were just throwing Yoda at the wall. We went and showed Brooke's parents her new knowledge, then said we were going to watch the movie. Brooke still wanted to hang out with us, and her parents said it...

Today, I'm starting at 10,018 words. I'm going to try to crank out 2,000 words like I have the last few days as well. But, I'm already starting to get tired. Skipping around, not going in order anymore. I'm a little discouraged. But, luckily, there's a lot of pep talks on the NaNoWriMo website that are pretty inspiring. Also, this Buzzfeed article made me laugh.   It's so true. I'm in my pajamas typing this.  I've been getting a lot of support though which makes me feel like I can do this. I also love love love this poem about writers block, especially the line about the sunburned brain. Sir Philip Sydney, you rock!  Loving in truth, and fain in verse my love to show That she (dear She) might take some pleasure of my pain: Pleasure might cause her  read,  reading might make her know, Knowledge might pity win, and pity grace obtain; I sought fit words to paint the blackest face of woe, Studying inventions fine, her wits to entertain: O...

I think I'm pretty funny sometimes. Like, when my conservative cousin got engaged, and I wrote on her bridal shower page on Facebook "Hey, remember when you made fun of me for working at Victoria's Secret? I bet you wished I still worked there now. ;)" Her fiance who I have never met was the only one who liked the status. I thought it was pretty funny, but knowing everyone else they probably thought it was just inappropriate. Lame. Or the time that my co-worker came back from lunch and smelled like beer. Our student union is in an old brewery, so it is very possible to get some beer during lunch if one wanted. Anyways. I felt the need to tell him he smelt like beer. He was like, no, I just put some hand sanitizer on. And I said, I know what hand sanitizer smells like, and you smell like beer. Either you're lying or you've got a yeast infection. It took him a minute to laugh at that one. Hahaha, this one cracks me up the most. Sammy was in the bathroom and ...

Everyone's wondering how wedding planning is going. And I just say good as per usual. And it has been going good. But it's also been, stressful.  I feel guilty. I feel guilty because I'm getting married. There are so many people out there who want to be, who want to meet that certain someone. And I have that. So I feel bad. I just want people to be happy.  I feel judged. We're not getting married in the temple the first time. We can't at this moment. And people have been saying, well just wait. Go on a mission. Finish school. Do something else. Don't just get married. But, that's not what I want. I've been with this boy three years. I can't do another one just dating him. My bad.  I feel there's a lot of expectations. I feel like, people will be traveling far to come to our wedding or reception and they'll be disappointed. Say why did we even bother coming here? I feel bad when people offer to help. To make things. To throw a p...

I started reading a book in Spanish. It's been hard but fun! I don't think I've really learned any new words yet though. I was reassigned to a different primary class. I'm pretty sad about it because I was just starting to get to know my first class. It's so sad in singing time when they turn around and look at me, confused as why I'm not their teacher anymore. My new class is pretty crazy. I don't know which I prefer, hyper five year olds or hyper six year olds who tell me they are very, very smart. Haha! My dog is so weird. I ate war heads with Sammy's little brother. It was so funny. I was trying so hard not to make the sour face but it didn't work. I had to. But Sammy's bro made the face first and looked like he was pooping. I felt like I was going to throw up. He had cherry and I had lemon, I had the sourest one. I'll do some pretty crazy things for respect ;)  I watched the documentary Blackfish. It was very eye opening. ...

It's NaNoWriMo a.k.a where lots of people try to write a 50,000 word novel in the month of November. And this year, I'm going to do it. I've been saying I'll do it for years, but this year, I can just feel it. Something's different. I'm going to do it. Let's hope I'm this motivated in a week ha! So, now I'm going to have weekly NaNoWriMo updates here on this blog of mine! Join me on my journey! Start a novel yourself! Let's chat about it! Woo! In the spirit of NaNoWriMo, here's something I've been working on, but not my project for NaNoWriMo. I hope you don't think it's ridiculous. I'm playing with the idea of what happens when what you thought was true love at 12 shows back up when you're 22. Yeah! My veins were going to start a protest soon. A full fledged marching around with signs and banners fight for their right to party. Actually just for the right to be able to do their job, and take away that nasty ...

I wasn't sure if college students dress up for halloween for not, so I decided to go simplistic with the costume this year. Plus, I'm still kind of obsessed with Divergent and I love to be characters from books. So I was Tris. I've already got the long blonde hair, I just wore a lot of black, some eyeliner, and Sammy drew on her bird tattoos. I was so impressed with his job, I didn't know that boy could draw! I felt pretty awesome not going to lie. It was fun seeing all the creative costumes on campus today as well. I hope everyone had a safe and fun Halloween

Batman came into the bookstore yesterday. I asked if I could take his picture, and he promptly did this. Then started reading his instruction manual. Then he left. And my coworkers and I had a discussion on how we should have addressed him, as Bruce, Adam West, or his royal darkness. Just kidding, I made the last one up. Then, we were googling all the old Batmans, and somehow that ended up with us googling cool ways to serve hotdogs. There are blogs dedicated to the subject my friends. 

I go to a commuter campus and I love it. It's something I didn't really understand before I was actually here, the concept of it. I actually thought I was going to hate living and going to school in the city, but I love it. Why? There's no homecoming. I love my school don't get me wrong, but I would rather represent it with getting a novel done that I'm proud of and published, not spending time watching people I don't know battle it out. There's none of those events and I don't know enough people on campus for it to be weird I don't go. Everyone else is busy. It's not expected for us all to hang out all the time. Almost everyone lives somewhere else and has other places to be. No feeling bad about not hanging out on campus. There are soooo many different people. The friends I have made are from every background and culture imaginable! It's so cool learning from them and all about the state. I get to ride the bus to school and get in a...

It's sir Sammy's birthday :) Totally one of the best days ever. Besides the day our Savior was born. And my parents. And his parents. And my siblings. And our soon to be wedding day. Anyways. It's a great day. It's the day my best friend joined me in the world! I'm so happy, this year I finally got to spend the whole day with him. He picked me up for school, we rode the bus together, had dinner, and watched the basketball game. I'm so thankful for this day and for this boy! May he have a million more awesome birthdays!

This is me today. And yesterday. Yesterday, I didn't sleep at all. I got up early and headed right to the bookstore before school to pick up Allegiant. And then, being my normal self, I read the last page in the checkout line. And then preceded to cry. And cry. And cry. I called Sammy crying, but he was busy getting his flu shot. So, I just cried some more. Then I read the book from start to finish, and just kept on crying. It was not any better knowing the context that came with. The only thing that makes me feel better is the ENTIRE internet is mad at the author as well. We're all upset. This didn't have to happen this way, it has a feeling of fakeness and like she just wanted controversy. I'm holding out hope that if enough of us get upset, that the movie company will change the ending. Because this is not ok. So if I seem sad today, you know why. I think I'mma go cry some more.

Being in a class dedicated to the idea of migration has really kept the idea of racism on the brain. In elementary school, the idea of racism was so defined to me, thinking people are better than others based solely on the color of their skin. It wasn't until middle school after reading many books that I realized racism wasn't jut as issue of black versus white, rather it applies to all cultures. In high school I was actually shocked to here racist statements from people I loved. All the sudden this issue became personal somewhat. (My favorite statement was from a little girl who said, it should be illegal for Mexicans to have babies. I guess I can't have kids then.)  But it wasn't until last week when we did an activity in my public health class that I realized that I myself was being racist as well. Now, this is something I am not proud of. I'm very embarrassed actually and that activity was humbling. Why am I writing about this? Because, it's som...

So, Sammy and I had a mini photo-shoot today with my mom. We haven't taken any photos of the two of us since we got engaged. It was so much fun : ) Now, I have a little surprise for all you blogger friends. I put some of the pictures up on my facebook, BUT I purposely left a bunch out because, well, they have a little extra detail in them that we're not announcing to the world yet. But, because all of you let me take peeks into your lives and leave such sweet messages for me, I wanted to share these with you first : )